Friday, November 04, 2005

I hate daytime television

It totally blows.
Does Maury Povich discuss anything besides cheating spouses & paternity tests? Oh wait, there's always the holiday shows where the screaming audience gets to guess if the trashily dressed person on stage is a man or a woman. Can't wait for those.

The View - annoying as hell. Vicki Gabareau - yawn. Regis & Kelly - ugh. What in the world is nanalan'? Oh I see - creepy puppets. Frasier - pompous ass. World Vision - I don't think so. At least there's cute animials on Zaboomafoo & sometimes Cityline can be really good. Other than that, blows, blows, blows. There's nothing on the movie channels I haven't already seen or have a desire to watch. The free preview of Life Network, HGTV & the Food Network is over so I can't watch Martha's new show anymore. I've read every baby book I have, checked out all the blogs I can link to & have googled everything from cloth diapering to breastfeeding to induction for overdue pregnancies to craft projects to dog allergies to The Apprentice updates and for the hell of it, the daily news. I don't know what else to do so I'm typing up this crap while I watch the Kratt brothers writhe on the ground like crocodiles. Great.... now the lemur puppet is rapping.

I am bored.

I am also cramping again. Or make that, still. No regularity. The membrane sweep was an odd experience, especially with Calvin in the room - it's not like he gets to come for my annual pap smears so it was kind of weird with him sitting there. He did behave quite well during this part of the appointment so I'll give him props for that. The stretching was uncomfortable & mildly painful in that it felt like period cramping. It really wasn't all that bad, just hard to stay relaxed especially when the bun was determined to keep kicking me in the ribs at the same time. The best part was when Josée said she could feel the baby's head. Awh. Maybe the kicking was in retaliation for being poked in the noggin.

So the stretching & the sweeping seems to have done a few things. It dislodged more of the mucus plug & brought out some blood at the end. Haven't seen any of that since last December so strange but all good signs. I had some cramping & tightening (contractions?) afterwards & we went walking around MEC & Ikea to see if we could get things going but again, nothing that needed looking at a watch (not that either of us were wearing one). We then went to get another ultrasound and once again, things looked good. We did have to do some more poking (this time on the outside - thank goodness) to get the bun moving as it seems the Tim Hortons lunch we had prior to this made it a little sleepy. Donuts make me tired too little one..... mmmm double chocolate.

After this big day we went home & hung out on the couch until we both fell asleep around 9. Pretty pathetic - I couldn't even make it through The Apprentice - but probably a good thing as I then woke up at 1am, 3am & 6ish when Calvin got up. The 3am waking was interesting to say the least as I finally had some bloody show. Gross & exciting at the same time. We sort of thought the contractions would come on after that, but looks like I'm still waiting. And waiting.... Waiting watching tv.....

Hence my dislike of daytime television that is now a burning hatred.

Oprah - I'm getting really tired of your decorating shows that give people hope that they too can have an absolutely fabulously decorated house with no serious idea of how much the stuff that you show costs. P.S. Colin Cowie - I love you, but the eyeliner today was a bit much. Can someone tell me what this crap called Passions is & why there is a witch & a baby that comes complete with pop-up cartoon bubbles above her head? Ooooo look, Coneheads is on - just what I want to watch before I get one of my own. Ahhhhhh. A show about art. At least I can get into that even if it makes me more of a geek. It's pretty.

That's it for now folks. I'm waiting for the midwives to call me, waiting for contractions to begin, waiting for good tv, waiting to meet the bun. I am trying to be patient. At least I'm hungry now, so I can go get something to eat to waste some more time. After that, maybe I'll do some more laundry & re-read another baby book or get yet another shower. Gotta keep distracted somehow.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Try www.ew.com! The magazine is really good and might come in handy during late night feedings. I was stuck with Sport Illustrated... "Life of Reilly" is good and I enjoy "Air and Space" but football and baseball bore me to death.

You can always start watching kids tv if you have TreeHouse, George Shrinks is good and the Backyardigans!

Hang in there, you'll meet the bun soon enough.

Barbie

maggie said...

Hang in there sis. It's gonna happen soon either way. I'm feeling kinda crampy too, maybe they're sympathy cramps.
Maybe you guys should splurge and subscribe to the HGTV, Food Network etc. I watch them quite a bit myself. (better than Maury - that's for sure)

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Heather said...

Well I just passed up an overtime night shift because I don't want to miss a thing...and it's hard to find childcare at this late hour. You're 100% right about Maury Laura; "Calvin when it comes to unamed bun #1, you are the father".
Now let's get this show on the road.

Love and Kisses

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