3 Weeks

So my little Freyja daya doodle bug is now 3 weeks old & is one of the best things that ever happened to me. She's so alert now & loves to look at the art on the walls, the black iron bedframe & sometimes, even the computer screen (geek baby!) so Calvin has decided to already put her on the path to rampant commercial consumerism by indoctrinating her into the world of Baby Einstein. It's been said before by me & many others (with some controversy I might add) that this stuff is like crack for babies (& some adults). She's only "watched" it 3 times & her attention span is really only good for about 5 minutes so it's not like we're getting her addicted to it or anything by plopping her down in front of it & leaving her there. It's just been a handy distraction for both baby & daddy while I go get a much needed shower or throw yet another load of laundry in the washer. We think she likes the bunnies & the birds.

Speaking of birds....

Murder!

There is this weird crow phenonmenon in our neighbourhood. For some bizarre reason all the crows in the city seem to congregate in this massive murder every day starting around 4ish. They group themselves in the trees & then start taking over parking lots & entire green spaces. We're talking thousands upon thousands of these cawing creatures creating a cacophony of creepy croaking cadences (how's that for some mad alliteration skillz?). Seriously it's totally creepy & I like crows. They group up & then fly to another group & so on & so on until there's about 10 thousand of them together & then they all take off to the area around the General Hospital. Is there something there we should know about that is attracting all these scavenging beasts? Some evil carrion that is placating these masses in some bizarre crow experiment perhaps in the hopes of creating a sequel to Hitchcock's "The Birds"? Whatever man, it's just weird.

So doodle bug & I have been on the "Candida Protocol" for over a week now & I think it's reached it's maximum effectiveness. Which is to say, not enough effect. The ointment & the Gentian Voilet seemed to make it a lot better right away but then, only to a certain extent. There is still the deep burning & the sharp shoulder blade (& now left elbow?!?!) pain that does not appear to want to go away. As of last night we get to stop the Violet for 2-3 days & then start again to see if that makes a difference, but I'm now making an appointment with my GP to get some stronger oral medication (Fluconazole [Diflucan]), which according to my sister clears this crap up good. Meanwhile, Freyja's butt rash is only mildly better & I feel soooo bad for her & her tender little tooshie. She doesn't look too happy when she has one of her explosive farts, though those of course could only make Calvin happy in a proud father sort of way. We're using Canesten & Zincofax to try & put a stop to the red bum rawness & I still get to use the All-Purpose Ointment after each feeding. I'm also taking Acidophilus & eating lots of yoghurt to try & combat this thing. At least the bun gets to have a break from looking like this for a few days.


Purple People Eater

She will eventually hate us for this won't she? Anyway, gotta get the little minx out the the Bjorn & attach her to my glorious chest before she starts screaming about the lack of lactose goodness in her belly. Oh ya, weird thing.... my lactose intolerance is a hell of a lot more tolerable now that I'm producing my own. Who would've thunk it?

Oh and many congrats & good luck to our pals John & Evelyn & Chris & Beth on the births of their new teeny tiny little bundles. Drop by if you need a break from listening to the crows at the General. Your darlings are in great hands.

P.S. Congratulations also to Frasier & Monilee. Hope your Costa Rica wedding was wonderful -sorry we couldn't make it but this bun thing made life a little crazy!

Dear Les Boys

Next time you goofs start buying celebratory drinks for my husband, instead of just buying enough to render him useless, please ensure that he imbibes enough liquor to have one hell of a hangover the next day. My punishment of bitchiness does not do him justice.


Nor does posting this.

Tweet tweet....

Meet the marvelous Hermit Thrush - a beautiful though somewhat drab creature of the avian world.

Don't worry, this post has nothing to do with birds. Just boobs. And thrush. The yeast kind. It's marvelous. I'm having a great time.

The pain I previously described turned out to be more than we bargained for. First there was the sharp pain when she latched on that I had been getting used to. Then there was the burning pain I thought was my let-down, but since it happened after we fed versus right before, turns out it was more of a warning sign. There was the cracking, mildly bleeding nipples & the diaper rash that was getting worse. Then to top it all off there was the excrutiating sharp pain in my shoulder blades that I thought was from sleeping in a different bed &/or being on the train for 8+ hours last weekend. It all just kept getting worse & culminated in a miserable Monday going into Tuesday when I desperately called the midwives & the lactation consultant at the hospital. Turns out we have thrush which is now being treated with "All Purpose Nipple Ointment" & Gentian Violet. It is starting to slowly feel better & we are hoping it'll clear up in the 4 - 7 days it's supposed to take. Meanwhile my baby is now affectionately known as "Grape Face".


Grape mouth - check out that funky lipstick!

It's from the Gentian Violet. The other side effect of all of this is that I get to walk around the house with my chest exposed for long periods of time. This is not an invitation for any of you boys to drop by unexpected. Or gals for that matter. I seriously feel like a cow while I'm air-drying my bits. If I'm not air-drying, we're feeding. Needless to say I am not having a world of fun at the moment. At least the Freyja bun is still doing well though she's pissed about the diaper rash & has been kind of frantic at the start of a feed. The lactation consultant weighed her on Tuesday & she's now a whopping 8 lbs 3 oz. so it's not like she's suffering too too much with this nastiness.

She's changed a lot since we brought her home & is starting to feel more like a little person with her hillarious facial expressions & her man-sized farts. Her cheeks are a little less squirrel like & we can see more of her pretty eyes now. She likes to alternately scrunch up like a turtle & stretch like a kitten & then starts kicking me in the chest when she's taking a crap. And man oh man, can that girl ever poo! Here's what she looks like when she's concentrating on filling up a load of treasures for daddy to clean up.


Oh my - what a serious preppie look.

Yesterday to make me feel better, Calvin took Freyja & I to Famous Babies at Silver City to see Walk the Line. There's a matinee once a week where you can bring your baby to the movie theatre & not worry about the crying & the fussing, because everyone else's baby is doing the same thing. There's also a stash of free diapers at the baby changing station in the hall - Calvin wants to go back to stock up, but I told him no. Anyway, it was a neat experience though somewhat strange to see that many babies in one place in the middle of the day. The movie was one I'd been wanting to see as I love Johnny Cash & I Walk the Line is my one of my all time favorite songs so a lovely time was had by all.

Today I went to a mommy & baby group thing to meet a new mommy pal I met while walking the dog at the pit. It was nice just hanging out with some other people who've also never been through this before & we all went for lunch at the Taj Mahal afterwards. Mmmmmm curry. Even baby likes the curry. See.


Sleepy smiles

Time flies

So my little Freyja daya doodle bug will be 2 weeks old tomorrow & life is pretty sweet. And busy and tiring and sore and emotionally draining and lovely all at the same time. The little bun has been growing very well which should be no surprise to those who've witnessed her voracious appetite. Or to anyone who's managed to see the raw stumps that were once my nipples. (Like I'll be showing those to anyone!) I swear this kid could eat a steak with the sharp little gums & killer latch that she has. I am surviving on stubborness & ibuprofen, but it is quite disturbing when you see blood in your child's mouth & know that it came from you. Then there is the let down.... let me tell you, it's quite the let down (ba da dum drum roll please). Fiery lava flow is more like it and now this is combined with a weird sharp pain in my shoulder blades when we feed & of course the raw stabbing feeling of flesh being ripped from probably the most sensitive part of my body. Oh but it's all for the best right?

I know it will get better, things will toughen up & I'm offering good nutrition to my little one so I am determined to keep going. There are of course the wonderful benefits of watching her while she eats & listening to the cute little cat / bird noises she makes as she sucks the bejeezus out of me. It's really cute & I can only get mad at myself for not being tough enough to handle the pain. Suck it up princess!

Here's my reward.

Snuggles before the fussing begins


Hanging out with the new doggie

This weekend we took a whirlwind trip to Toronto to have a quick visit with Uncle Bruce & Aunt Susanne since they had a stopover before heading to Jamaica (lucky bastards). Aunt Nancy had been staying with us for the past week, cooking up whatever our hearts desired & making life pretty easy on us so we she left we took the train with her back to Brampton to make some family introductions. Thank you so much to Nancy & Rory & Liam for putting us up & lots of love. Word of advice: the train is awesome for rocking babies to sleep. Freyja loved it & pretty much napped the whole way there & back. Here's the proof.


Train girl

Anyway, gotta take the munchkin out of her swing & give her some snuggle time before the feeding commences again. There's more posts coming people - birth story included. I'm just having some time management issues at the moment, but we are slowing getting the hang of things around here. She makes it all worth while.

P.S. Congratulations Roopa & Mike on the birth of Uma! She's a real cutie pie.

Some pretty pictures

Yo yo yo


My little swiss miss


first pit walk


Kisses from dad


My Precious

Super Pooper Trooper

Sorry for the lack of updates my friends... it's been overwhelming to say the least. This one will just be a quickie but I promise there will be more to follow as soon as we get our bearings. And a couple more showers. And some more food as I am now ravenous almost constantly. And of course after a few more snuggles with the bun.


Calvin gave me this in exchange for this ....


Going Home

Introducing Freyja Marguerite Drover.

Freyja is pronounced Fray-ah. Just say it fast & don't think about the j. If you want some info (mildly cheesy in a Lord of the Rings kind of way) on where her name comes from go here. Basically the goddess of love & beauty. Marguerite is Calvin's mother's name and means "pearl". Drover... "driver of herds to the village". So she's a beautiful pearl of a girl who likes farm animals.

She's a real cutie-putootie & very snuggly. She likes to make impressions of purring kittens & velocirapters. She loves to sleep and can be very hard to wake up to feed, but once she's on the boob there's no coming off, much to the chagrin of my poor nipples. (Thanks for the lansinoh Katherine!!!) She loves the swing & to be swaddled up tight like a burrito. Diaper changing - not so much, hence the velocirapter noises. When she's awake she looks around & checks us out in wonder at "what these silly giants are & why are they making silly noises at me?" kind of way.

I'll let you all know about the labour ordeal later when I wrap my head around how to tell it. Let's just say the induction drugs were "manageable" up to 7cm & then the aneasthesiologist became my good buddy. This was eventually followed by 2 solid hours of pushing, with only 1 of those actually doing anything productive. Eventually she came out (with no tearing!!! i can't believe it!) & proceeded to take the biggest crap - all over her new mommy. It was love at first poop & first sight.

Daddy couldn't be happier with his new little bun & mum is recovering pretty well, but we both need a little more sleep (ya fat chance eh?) & then we'll share her with the rest of the world. Thank you all so much for your support & wonderful comments - they really mean a hell of lot to us & it wouldn't have been the same without them. We love you guys!


Daddy's little girl

Girl

5:44 am, November 8, 2005.
7 pounds 14 oz., 21"long.
Conehead, full head of hair.
Cute as a button.

Picture: http://calvindrover.ww.com

More updates after a hell of a lot of sleep.

There is movement

It is 7:00 PM and I have been sent home by Laura to walk the dog. Thought I would give a quick update before I headed back to the hospital.

Laura is progressing nicely, and is in active Labour. I am also progressing nicely and am experiencing active anxiety.

Bun is moving downwards, Laura has dialated to over 5cm at this point, and we are expecting bun to emerge before daybreak.

-Calvin

Water is broken......

Contractions are starting, lots of walking complete. Now on Oxytocin to help labour progress.

More later folks.

-Calvin

Good morning

Nothing happened overnight except some more cramping. It's like I ate something that doesn't agree with me - that's all. I know some of them are contractions otherwise I wouldn't be dilated to almost 4 cm & more than 50% effaced as of yesterday (hopefully more now). I could tell by the monitor yesterday that when I started having trouble breathing that a contraction was coming. It would get a bit achy in my back & a perhaps a little in the belly which then got really hard. I feel like a total idiot because I haven't been able to tell if I'm having a contraction or not. I know a lot of women would be feeling it more & would have been in the hospital by now, but for me it hasn't been so bad that I can't concentrate on anything else beside the contraction, which is what I was told real labour would be like. Maybe I'm lucky, maybe I'm stupider than I thought... I guess ignorance is bliss, at least for now.

This morning we are going to the hospital at 10 am for some sort of induction. If my Bishop Score is still under 7 (it was 6 yesterday) then we'll try the cervidil, if not I suppose it is straight to the pitocin, unless the amniotomy is possible. Whatever happens today won't be leaving the hospital without the bun out of the oven this time. I'm sure many of you will be relieved to know that there will be no home birth for us. I'll just be relieved to get that damn plastic off the hobo bed - I am so tired of all the rustling & crinkling. I'm also kind of relieved that the decision will be made for us rather than me hemming & hawing (?) at the last minute & worrying about whether or not we are doing the right thing & also about other people's reactions.

OK Time to try & relax... I'm starting to get all nervous & freaked out, like before I have to go in & teach a class or give a presentation. Gotta calm the breathing, get a shower & go buy a good book before we meet Josee at the hospital. Wish us luck & keep checking back for updates if you like. There's dial up at the Monfort so Calvin's got my laptop all packed so we can blog & e-mail when we get bored or when the deed is done.

Ack! I'm having a baby!!!!!!!

Apologies to the internets

Bun is still in the oven my friends. Apparently Calvin's little update promted ya'll to think I was in active labour. I think I'm in some kind of labour, but as to how active it is - that is questionable. I have contractions where it gets hard to breathe, my belly gets hard & there's some cramping & sometimes tingly pain in the cervix region, but nothing is so bad as of yet that I can't deal with it by relaxing & breathing. Some are worse than others, but I'm really not having that much difficulty or pain that I can't cope with. Mind you I haven't really moved from the couch that much today either so that might have something to do with it.

Yesterday I had another stretch & sweep - this time at home. More cramping & bloody type after effects. No chance to rupture the membranes as the bun's head was in the way - basically would've got poked in the head with the crochet-hook contraption. So we made the decision to go to the hospital this morning for a Non-Stress Test & possible Cervidil insertion. Off to the Monfort bright & early we go to get hooked up to a fetal heart rate / contraction monitor thing for about a half an hour. I had to drink some apple juice & poke at the belly a bit so we could get some reactions from the sleepy-head baby but we got it going good enough to have a positive test. This is how much fun it was.


Not stressing & hey, my pants match the belts!

The Cervidil thing was another matter though as hospital policy was not to let me escape after it was inserted since I am now post-dates. We didn't want to hang out at the hospital for a possible 24 hours with nothing happening so we decided to wait until Monday to do it. Instead we did another stretch & sweep & attempted to break my waters again - no luck though as the head was still in the way of the bag. The s & s brought on some crampy contractions again & Josée was encouraged enough to tell us to go home, pick up some castor oil on the way, have a castor oil root beer float & do some pumping..... oh ya, we went & got a breast pump yesterday after the 2nd sweep as nipple stimulation is supposed to increase oxytocin levels & therefore bring on contractions.

Ya, so pumping prior to having a bun in my arms is very weird. We got a Medela single electric one & it's pretty comfortable but kind of loud so I have to turn up the television when I use it. It did seem to bring on some contractions but I needed a break so they eventually subsided. Same thing today. The castor oil root beer float was not too bad, but way way too sweet. Even Calvin tried some to be supportive. We both thought it would work pretty quickly but turns out it can take 4 - 6 hours to go through your system. Well it's through now & it really wasn't bad - I've had way worse with a spoonful of ice cream or an IBS episode. Calvin didn't like it so much though - poor guy doesn't have the same experience to prepare him for a painful butt explosion.

So if these contractions (which at the moment seemed to have disappeared) don't do anything tonight, it's off to the Monfort or possibly the Civic tomorrow. I guess it'll be induction time.... I would prefer this to unfold naturally on it's own time, but everyone seems to want this bun out of me sooner rather than later. I can't say I don't agree, but I wish my body would do it on it's own rather than have to succumb to the synthetic hormones. Whatever.... it'll all work out in the end. Plus I have this to look forward to.


My incentive

Surrogate Blogger

No bun yet, and Laura is taking a nap. Things look like they are progressing, and Laura will post an update this evening.

Stay tuned......

Patience

Yes, it's Saturday. I am 15 days overdue. We are waiting for the midwife to call back - she's at another birth at the moment. The plan for today is to go for another sweep & if nothing happens then it's off to the hospital (tonight or tomorrow?) to try some cervidil. I'm drinking red raspberry leaf tea like it's going out of style & I've taken no lactaid pills with the cream pastry & the pizza I had today but so far nothing is coming out of me. We went for a long walk with the dog this morning & I think (again) that I had a couple of contractions. I'm sitting on my exercise / birthing ball trying to bounce & roll into beneficial positions. I'll probably take yet another hot jacuzzi bath to just try & relax. If we can't get things going this weekend we'll head to the hospital for induction on Monday after yet another Bio-Physical Profile ultrasound.

I'm emotionally spent & it's hard to cope with the fact that I'm keeping everyone waiting. Physically I feel ok & the bun is still moving around quite a bit so I know that nothing is wrong. Believe me, I've gone over every what if scenario there is & the pros & cons of waiting, inducing & surgery. I am fully informed, educated & I trust my wonderful midwives. I will not risk the bun or myself just because I think I desire a drug-free birth. If we need intervention of any sort we will go for it - no questions asked.

Though I've felt somewhat betrayed by my body in the past day or so, I know that it is capable of doing difficult things. I also know that it likes to take it's time with things. It likes food really well cooked. My cycles are normally longer than the average person (last one before the getting knocked up one was 55 days). I normally ovulate late. I like to think things over thoroughly before I come to a decision - of course Calvin would say I just can't make a decision. My family has a tendancy to be late for everything. I was born 2 weeks late & my sister Andrea was apparently about 17 days late and just under 10 pounds. So I'm just following tradition & I suppose, what is normal for me. There you have it. We'll let you know what's going on later.

If you want here's more information on related stuff.

Overdue versus Postdate
Postdate induction stuff
Labour Induction
Induction of Labour
Home Birth Study
My midwives

I might add more later, but this is all I've got the stamina to look up right now.

I hate daytime television

It totally blows.
Does Maury Povich discuss anything besides cheating spouses & paternity tests? Oh wait, there's always the holiday shows where the screaming audience gets to guess if the trashily dressed person on stage is a man or a woman. Can't wait for those.

The View - annoying as hell. Vicki Gabareau - yawn. Regis & Kelly - ugh. What in the world is nanalan'? Oh I see - creepy puppets. Frasier - pompous ass. World Vision - I don't think so. At least there's cute animials on Zaboomafoo & sometimes Cityline can be really good. Other than that, blows, blows, blows. There's nothing on the movie channels I haven't already seen or have a desire to watch. The free preview of Life Network, HGTV & the Food Network is over so I can't watch Martha's new show anymore. I've read every baby book I have, checked out all the blogs I can link to & have googled everything from cloth diapering to breastfeeding to induction for overdue pregnancies to craft projects to dog allergies to The Apprentice updates and for the hell of it, the daily news. I don't know what else to do so I'm typing up this crap while I watch the Kratt brothers writhe on the ground like crocodiles. Great.... now the lemur puppet is rapping.

I am bored.

I am also cramping again. Or make that, still. No regularity. The membrane sweep was an odd experience, especially with Calvin in the room - it's not like he gets to come for my annual pap smears so it was kind of weird with him sitting there. He did behave quite well during this part of the appointment so I'll give him props for that. The stretching was uncomfortable & mildly painful in that it felt like period cramping. It really wasn't all that bad, just hard to stay relaxed especially when the bun was determined to keep kicking me in the ribs at the same time. The best part was when Josée said she could feel the baby's head. Awh. Maybe the kicking was in retaliation for being poked in the noggin.

So the stretching & the sweeping seems to have done a few things. It dislodged more of the mucus plug & brought out some blood at the end. Haven't seen any of that since last December so strange but all good signs. I had some cramping & tightening (contractions?) afterwards & we went walking around MEC & Ikea to see if we could get things going but again, nothing that needed looking at a watch (not that either of us were wearing one). We then went to get another ultrasound and once again, things looked good. We did have to do some more poking (this time on the outside - thank goodness) to get the bun moving as it seems the Tim Hortons lunch we had prior to this made it a little sleepy. Donuts make me tired too little one..... mmmm double chocolate.

After this big day we went home & hung out on the couch until we both fell asleep around 9. Pretty pathetic - I couldn't even make it through The Apprentice - but probably a good thing as I then woke up at 1am, 3am & 6ish when Calvin got up. The 3am waking was interesting to say the least as I finally had some bloody show. Gross & exciting at the same time. We sort of thought the contractions would come on after that, but looks like I'm still waiting. And waiting.... Waiting watching tv.....

Hence my dislike of daytime television that is now a burning hatred.

Oprah - I'm getting really tired of your decorating shows that give people hope that they too can have an absolutely fabulously decorated house with no serious idea of how much the stuff that you show costs. P.S. Colin Cowie - I love you, but the eyeliner today was a bit much. Can someone tell me what this crap called Passions is & why there is a witch & a baby that comes complete with pop-up cartoon bubbles above her head? Ooooo look, Coneheads is on - just what I want to watch before I get one of my own. Ahhhhhh. A show about art. At least I can get into that even if it makes me more of a geek. It's pretty.

That's it for now folks. I'm waiting for the midwives to call me, waiting for contractions to begin, waiting for good tv, waiting to meet the bun. I am trying to be patient. At least I'm hungry now, so I can go get something to eat to waste some more time. After that, maybe I'll do some more laundry & re-read another baby book or get yet another shower. Gotta keep distracted somehow.

Hurry Hard

Stretched & swept.
Head engaged & felt by midwife during the poking. Cervix soft, short & has begun to dilate (1cm upper & 3cm lower). In other words we are good to go & it "should" happen within the next couple of days without having to go for a pitocin induction. Yay!

We also had another ultrasound this afternoon & the oven still looks great. The last one (Monday) we scored 8 out of 8 on the Bio-Physical Profile & it sounded like the same today, though the technician couldn't really say. We'll find out tomorrow morning from Josee. If things are as good as they seem, she might come over for another stretch & sweep & possibly break my waters. Unless of course things begin tonight. There's been some tightening in the lower belly but no pain.

I feel like there's more to say, but my brain has turned to mush. I'll update this better tomorrow. For now here's the last bit of baby bait. I managed to exchange the Boo onesie for a Santa outfit. Let's hope it makes it out in time for Xmas.


The hunt is on


Even the dog likes it

Happy Birthday Todd

Make sure you rest up before drinking copious amounts of sake.


Birthday boy

In other news..... nothing. Midwife appointment at 1:00 today. Going for the big sweep. Update later.

More bait

MEC finally came through with the car seat adapter thingamajig so now we have more bait for the bun to come out. Calvin was sure the contratption was what it was waiting for & that he wouldn't have to go to work today, but alas, it is not to be my friends.


But yay!

I think I had a contraction last night around supper time because I had to stop in the hallway & just try to breathe. No real pain, but something sure stopped me in my tracks. I kept waiting for more & I maybe felt another minor one as I was watching tv, but then nothing else happened. So I keep waiting.... and waiting. I am tired of waiting at home by myself in front my two best friends, the computer & the television so today I am going out armed only with my cell phone & a full tank of gas. Perhaps it'll do the trick & my waters will break while I'm at Old Navy or something. At least I'd have a great story to tell the bun.

So to keep you all amused here's what the belly looks like as of today.


Left side looking small & the button is kinda wonky.


Sticking out the right side.

Yes I am still wearing those bloody sweatpants. I suck I know. But like I said I'm going out today..... I will wear some real clothes I promise. I'll even shower & put on makeup like a real girl. And hey, look! I even managed to do my toes again.


Blue or pink..... come on out & let us know!

We're still here freaks!

Or maybe that should read the freaks are still here. I don't even pretend to understand anything anymore. I just do a lot of shoulder shrugging. Now combined with leftover Halloween treat eating. I think I'm getting a bit of a belly. What do you think?


Oh ya!

The dog still looks good though.

Super dog

Note: too much information ahead... you have been warned.

Just because I'm so sure you all want to know, there's been more snot-like emanations from the nether recesses of my crotch. Can you say gross?! At least it's a sign. But then I thought that a couple of weeks ago too & look what came of that. Though I can't find any research that backs up the theory, apparently the mucus plug can regenerate. I guess that's what happened because it looks exactly the same as before. I even have a picture if you are desperate to see the grossness - just let me know. (Yes I know it's weird to take a picture but I like documentation. I am such a freaking geek!)

I am cramping again & if I really thought about it hard enough I just might be able to feel some sort of pattern. At this point though I am just feeling a bit apathetic & nothing is feeling really bad so far so I figure, why bother? Everyone keeps saying "oh you'll know when you're in labour" and I really don't want to have a big false labour dress rehearsal only to have everything peter out and still no bun. But then, deep in the recesses of internet labour stories there are those that say they felt hardly anything until it was time to push or better yet, didn't even know they were in labour until the big moment. Oh to have such luck. Although, admittedly these are totally frightening tales in their own right - taken by surprise is not my idea of fun.

So there you have it. You'd think I'd have some elephant genes or something.