Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Can I be any lamer?

I am sucking at the posting. Big time.

My days have all blurred into one. One big ass day where I wake up, attach baby to chest, wince in pain, doze off when baby dozes off, wake up, take ibuprofen & slather nipples in ointment, burp baby, change baby, make silly faces & noises at baby, attempt to get cup of coffee & bowl of cereal, cajole baby into swing while eating, feed baby while reading e-mail, don't reply to any e-mails, listen to phone ring in other room while feeding baby, burp baby, listen to screaming farting baby, change diapers again, take more ibuprofen, slather nipples again, give baby medicine, watch baby writhe in discomfort, feed baby again to comfort, try to ignore pain in shoulder blades, watch baby sleep in lap, change baby, add more clothes to baby, strap baby in bjorn, attach dog to leash, walk outside, pick up dog poop, swear at dog, try to get lunch while baby dozes in bjorn, feed baby while feeding self in front of computer, leave dishes in a mess because don't want to wake sleeping baby in lap, listen to baby farting, change baby, baby pees while changing, get another diaper, go through process again, give baby more medicine, give baby gripe water to counteract effects of medicine, snuggle baby to comfort, listen to phone messages, think about getting back to people, attempt to format photos for very late e-mail announcement, feed screeching baby, let baby nap in lap again because if moved will wake up thus thwart attempts at photo formatting, feed baby again, burp baby, walk around with baby & attempt to placate with swing / mirror / art / bouncy chair, feed rooting baby again, take more ibuprofen, take metamucil to counteract constipating effects of ibuprofen, take acidophilus to counteract yeast, eat granola bar snack, jiggle baby to calm down, swaddle baby in attempt to calm, change baby to see if reason for crying, baby farts / poops while changing so put on new diaper, feed baby again, wonder if this is growth spurt, burp baby, cry with baby, attempt to swaddle baby again as has managed to pry arms loose, turn on cd of hair dryer noise & attempt putting baby in bassinet for much needed nap, try pacifier as boobs are screaming now too, do double swaddle, cuddle baby, baby falls asleep in arms, attempt transfer to bassinet, bassinet transfer complete on 3rd try, baby naps for 1 hour of peace, do load of laundry, attempt to catch up on e-mail, finish formatting 5 more photos, think about what to o for dinner, realize haven't blogged in a week, start typing, baby wakes up, feed baby & type with one hand, baby cat naps in lap again for 10 minutes, dog starts barking at passing world, swear at dog again, dog wakes baby who starts looking very cute by making poo face, starts to sqirm & fuss, naps again for 5 minutes, looks around at world & smiles while passing gas.

This is my day. Everyday. Don't get me started on her fussy evening time & the 3 feeds a night.

She's gonna getcha - my task master.

Then she makes up for all of this by looking this gosh darn cute.

zonked out

I do love her so.
Freyja is now 4 weeks old & weighs 9 lbs 1 oz as of last Friday. She feels bigger & looks longer. I can see some of the clothes getting tighter on her chubby little body. She's having more awake periods & I swear she's starting to smile at us rather than just having gas all the time. She also managed to turn over from her belly to her back last night according to Calvin. She now loves the bath & going outside for walks & has also managed to find her cute long little fingers to stick in her mouth which is good news for my boobs, plus it cuts down on the volume of her screams. Because we torture her. Well not really, but you'd think we were with all the crying. Poor baby.

I really think she's just uncomfortable with this thrush crap. Some days her diaper rash seems cleared up, other days she crys when she farts. There's been an increase in gas output from both ends & she seems to be in pain sometimes when she scrunches up her little body during a poop. There's not much we can do besides take all our medicine like good little girls & feed her to comfort her when she gets upset. It's just heartbreaking to see her upset & I wish I could do more besides wait for this freaking Fluconazole to start working. In the grand scheme of things I know we don't have it too bad & we're damn lucky to have a healthy & relatively happy baby, but damn this parenting thing is tough. Here come the all-knowing looks & I told you so's right? I was never under the impression that it would be a slice of cake or the illusion that I would have free time to myself - I'm just acknowledging the hard parts. Which are of course coupled with the beautiful parts that are just as soul wrenching in the all-encompassing love one feels for this tiny little soul.

Bzzzzz Posted by Picasa


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